Muddle-headed Kay (mhw) wrote,
Muddle-headed Kay
mhw

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Waiting for the Sukkubus

Some years ago I wasn't in a band, and definitely not a Goth band, that wasn't called "Velvet Crisis" [0] which had no satirical purpose at all, never mind referring to any particular other band, and we played a packed-to-capacity Patchway University Great Hall and sold many albums and became squizillionaires and died of cocaine and egoboo. [1]

Anyway, in a fit of nostalgia for things that never were, I've just spent a happy while trawling the Net revisiting those times which, if you can remember them, you weren't there, and quite coincidentally I came across a potted explanation I'd once written of the bits in the Malleus Maleficarum about succubi. [2]
1) Can demons impregnate women?
2) No, because
2a) they're essentially spiritual entities,
and
2b) God would never allow that to happen.
3) So how is it that witches, who by their horrid nature are forced to live apart from humanity, can become pregnant?
4) By demonic agency.
5) I thought you just said that demons couldn't?
6) They can't. Are you a heretic or something?
7) No, but I do confess to it all seeming somewhat contradictory.
8) It's like this. Demons, not being human, can't make human sperm. So they obtain it by deception. They disguise themselves as beautiful women and seduce men. When all the grunting's over, they bottle the goop up.
9) And?
10) And then – and here's the smart part – they disguise themselves as beautiful men (they can do this because they're essentially spiritual, remember, and have no real sex), and go and seduce women. Witches, usually, because being evil they're naturally susceptible to these things.
11) So the men seduced by these demons are also evil?
12) No, they just can't help themselves. Anyway, they use the goop from stage 8 to impregnate the woman.

So, apparently, Demon-Mediated Donor Insemination is a Bad Thing, but God permits it.

And the only reason that these two things have anything to do with each other is that one of the songs that we didn't write wasn't called Waiting for the Sukkubus (at the Sukkubus-stop). So now you know.

[0] "Bristol's foremost animé - viking - darkwave - techno - electro - goth band"

[1] Cocaine and Egoboo? Yay, new track name. Now all we need to do is play a few rounds of Novella and we'll have lyrics for it :)

[2] Which have been on my mind for the last couple of days since I read a splendid Diana Gabaldon Lord John short story.
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